Just stop!

29 November 2014

What a lovely Saturday off…. well, kind of ‘off’…. in so much as I had the middle part of the day away from the laptop! Quite an achievement to be honest! Just a few short weeks ago, I had an email from some extremely distant (but extremely lovely) cousins who were travelling to Wiltshire/Gloucestershire area from the West Country, asking if I was available for a lunch get-together. Well, of course I am! I have a huge family (on Pa FWL’s side more than Ma’s) but none of them are brilliant at keeping in touch.

So, we arranged to have lunch at the Smoking Dog in Malmesbury – though calling it the Spotted Dog, Speckled Hen and various other animals on numerous occasions! Dropping off an invoice en route, I found myself at Junction 17 of the M4 significantly earlier than expected – thank goodness. I had a learner driver in front of me. Eek….

Yes, we’ve all been there, I know. Ma & Pa FWL went through the challenges of me learning the rules of the road, but this learner was absolutely beyond belief. I cannot fathom how the instructor had any hair left by the time we arrived in Malmesbury…. She hit the curb FIVE times and had no sense of spatial awareness, braking at every bend and regularly traversing the central white line onto the other side of the road. To be honest, how the cyclist is still alive is beyond me. I was so grateful when the learner driver turned left and I was turning right. Please don’t ever pass this woman to drive on the road on her own. Ludicrous. No matter how many lessons. Just stop now!

Treated to a lovely lunch at the aforementioned establishment, I even had some time to potter in the charity shops and locate the grave of Hannah Twynnoy in the Abbey who was killed by a tiger – yes, it’s true! Lovely day…. and then returned to Calne to find a crazy number of people in the town. All I wanted was to find some food in Sainsburys and pay a cheque into the Post Office, but it took yonks with stalls and heaven alone knows what else in The Pippin. Fun this festive stuff…. hmmm….

To cap it all, I arrived back home to find that my near neighbours have decided to put up their Christmas lights – on the outside of the house – on 29 November. Are you kidding me? I don’t mind in December (baa humbug) but it’s not even December…. Just stop! NOW!

The festive season can – for some – start on Monday, if desired. But now, it is still November. PLEASE JUST STOP! 

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