The power of patience

14 July 2016

Don’t faint in shock. Yes, I can be patient! Not too often mind…. but sometimes it’s worth it. Today, we received a client’s adoption papers. We have waited TEN MONTHS to receive them. At times, I have wondered if they would ever be released.

We started with a birth name and ordered a birth certificate to find the identity of the birth parent/s and the place of birth. Armed with the address of a Mother and Baby Home, the application was completed and we were told it would take between nine and eighteen months for our application to be processed. So, you have decided to start your search for your birth parents…. and you then have to wait for an inordinate amount of time! Ludicrous. However, due to our involvement, the papers were fast-tracked and our client will (tomorrow) receive all the documents relating to his adoption. Although the birth certificate does not record a birth father, he is specifically named in the adoption paperwork (with an age, occupation and place of residence) and so now our mission is to locate the two of them.

Great inroads have already been made. The birth mother married (twice) and had a daughter (half-sister to our client) whose current address is known. In fact, the birth mother may well still be alive (although knocking on the door of 80 years old). A situation which requires careful management, of course…. The father is more elusive (today) but he won’t be able to hide. The more important question is: will the birth mother and/or father be willing to engage when contacted? Taking the decision to trace your birth parents is a tough one and there is always the risk that they will not reply/not want to re-connect.

Fortune favours the brave. Nothing ventured nothing gained. Time to take that leap…. get in touch with us if you are in this position. You will be met with nothing but empathy, compassion and a dogged determination to find you answers and connect you with those who came before you…. no matter how long it takes.

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